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, explains: “Most religions and spiritual traditions view successful committed relationships in terms of the goal of ‘two become one’.” A concept that even the Spice Girls got hung up on.

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Not so much your clashing views on , but, as Dr Fraenkel coins it, how you “inhabit time”.

here’s an Instagram account with more followers than Hillary Clinton, Salma Hayek and Tom Ford. In sync, loving each other’s filters off, from the mattress to the mountaintop.

What does it have that a global politician, actress and fashion designer don’t? It’s called @couplegoals, and 4.3 million people idolise what they see. Even getting my partner to take a shot for Instagram involves huffing – “This is a waste of time” (him), “Darling, no one looks at the camera any more” (me) – and one soft-focused, cockeyed shot that goes to Recently Deleted faster than you can hit Unfollow. We have different nationalities, first languages, work schedules (often work countries) and body clocks. In cleaning, my efficiency battles his love of festering. Yet of the six couple shots I do have on Instagram, four are from our wedding and honeymoon.

Couples making out on a beach without a care for getting a sandy gusset.

He has a financial portfolio and makes weekly graphs of his assets. So, if having different lives and interests can’t be that bad, why do so many people think it is?




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